Ein thinks too much

Instead of working, I'm stuck here in lalaland doing nothing but thinking.

Dad's birthday is today and we're still up to our necks preparing for the dinner tomorrow night.

Dresses to wear, shoes to match the dress, necklaces, etc.

Aside from that, I have a question dangling in my mind...

Does the spark really exist?

As in hollywood teenybopper spark. Is it real?

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'C' and I have been friends for years. As in a very long long time. We met back in third grade when we were really young and he was like a little brother of sorts to me. Even during our childhood years, I already was the alpha male. Class pres, active student, etc. I kicked people's asses when he got bullied, in return he carried my bags, books, chased away silly crushing kids and even opened doors for me. Now we're talking about dating. No, not him and I. About me and people I met along the way.

I'm a twenty-one year old laptop toting dude. (I don't want to say "girl"). Going to law school, working and getting promoted still, doing make up jobs every now and then, great payslips every month and a bank account that continues to make me happy. It's all about the zeros. In time I will have enough to make my 'rents proud. I can cook, sew, play more than four instruments and do more things only heaven knows. Also, still very single.

It's a choice.

Rumors always fly around about me dating people, getting hooked up and all. All funk, no glory, since I've been single all my life. Then this one person comes in and I start questioning my choices.

We've been going out with friends for some time. My sister think this person is okay, my Mom thinks this person is okay too. Everybody else thinks we look good together. However, for me, there's no spark.

Is there really a spark?

I asked 'C' and he said it did exist.

Was it a firework kind of thing? Magic? Lights going up on the sky?

He said probably.

How do you know if there's a spark? How do you that's it?

I want to know, seriously.

Or am I looking for something that doesn't even exist?

I don't know, world.

But even tho there's no spark, I still love you world.